This Way to the Rubicon

What are these feelings?

Why are they here?

They're magical

and fill me with fear.

New again.

Renewed and then,

It's lovely to be wanted.

Hard for me not to flaunt it.

Deeper and deeper

these choices aren't wise.

Convincing myself our knot is tight.

Still, I loosen up the ties.

A heart that's abundant.

I've plenty to share.

It's not all for you,

that doesn't mean I don't care.

Fair's not always equal

and other excuses you make.

Can't deny the burning and yearning.

Won't predict how long this will take.

Could let it run it's course

like the blood racing through my veins.

Could end it in a flash

Sever everything but the pain.

Never asked for all this

but I guess, maybe I did.

Thought I'd have the best of both worlds

not have to chose which one to rid.

Fear of the rejection

the regrets and eyes that resent.

Fear of hurting so many people.

Temptation's not only a serpent.

And it's not fair to lose all the joy

the beaming faces,

imagined romantic places,

and the seduction that's been employed.

Answers should be easy,

but the questions make me queasy,

and I don't want to think anymore.

I just want to be with the one I adore.

Airport Rendezvous

I am a weary traveler

Been in the air all night.

Gathered up my carry on;

Had to wait for another flight.

Sat in the terminal

with a coffee in my hand.

Noticed one guy I was flying with,

his face was kind of bland.

Now the place was pretty empty.

No crowds. No noise. How rare.

Felt like I could die

and no one would really care.

The bland guy with the glasses

really looked a wreck.

I couldn’t believe what he was doing;

Putting a tie around his neck.

This guy stood taller with each moment.

He re-tucked his shirt and pulled lint from his coat.

Pulled a card from his briefcase;

Wish I saw what he had wrote.

He scanned the crowd intently

and wandered from the gate.

I’d seen that look before,

like a man waiting for his date.

As if on cue he began to beam

all blandness had left his face.

It took only an instant but in that instant

he was transformed to another place.

I followed the direction of his gaze.

She too was radiant in her boots and black knit dress;

and a smile that competed with the rays of dawn.

“Is that you?” he asked, and she cried out, “Yes!”

They tangled themselves into an embrace

that lasted longer than the flight, it seemed.

Then they kissed, without remorse and I heard him whisper,

“You’re everything I’ve dreamed.”

Now I’m a weary traveler

but I only think of you.

And like that guy,

I dream of an airport rendezvous.

That's entirely up to you

Look how you glow

there’s a smile, you know

etched across your face.

It’s been quite awhile

since you wore that gorgeous smile

so lightly all over the place.

Up ‘til the wee morning hours

sometimes even later.

Chatting to him across the miles

your affection grows greater.

There’s flattery and charm.

You laugh together, so at ease

With flirtatious skills he does disarm

and you handover those emotion filled keys.

You love it all

Yet it all seems a bit wrong.

You feel bad

but the feeling’s so strong.

So unexpected

So thrilling and new.

A race of emotions.

You don’t know what to do.

The speed of your connection

leaves you breathless

and in awe.

And none of it takes away the feelings

you still have for another,

but you can’t quite withdraw.

This is too new and exciting

and his words,

so inviting.

To be swept off your feet

what was missing

suddenly feels complete.

Not long now before one of you

declares your love for the other.

You’ll be shaken

and feel strange,

become restless

with pangs.

You’ll justify

that it’s only a crush.

and question

the need to rush.

How can this seduction

just linger?

You’ll dream of his arms wrapped around you

caressing your cheek with his finger.

You’ll feel anxious and fright

as you anticipate each night

until the time he’s not there.

Then despondent, you’ll swear

And then you’ll try to repair

the distance that’s grown with another.

Then that will be great,

but it will be too late,

for he’ll approach you again

with sorry’s so grand

and promises and wishes to meet in the Fall

and with words that enrapture and simply enthrall.

He’ll send you a gift

and notes of affection.

Will complement your taste

and congratulate you on your selection.

He’ll offer to help

and your frowns will end.

You’ll wonder how you got so lucky

to have such a good friend.

And friend will become code

as you embark down a road

and shudder to think what could come next.

And again in your bliss

you’ll feel the feelings you missed

And you won’t be shy to tell him so.

Then he’ll ask you for more

and tell you how much he adores

the time he spends only with you.

Then he’ll press you a bit

to figure out where he now fits

and that’s when you’ll decide.

What’s worth more to you,

what you have

or what you have not?

What you know

or discovering what you know not?

What will you do?

That’s entirely up to you.